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Your Parents Were Indeed AwesomeAs an addendum to the post below, Band of Fathers contributor Mike Rehfus points you to a site called “My Parents Were Awesome.”
It shows how rad your parents’ lives were before you came along. For example, check out how awesome Frank, Jerry, and this group of friends were back-in-the-day.
Your Dad Used to Totally Get LaidYou may have seen some print ads a while back for Canadian Club whiskey featuring the tagline, “Damn right your dad drank it.” I found this campaign somewhat thought-provoking because it spoke to how ‘cool’ our dads were before we came into the grainy, Polaroid picture. Our dads had loves, they had lives! Don’t we want our kids to know the same about us? Similar to the dudes in the ads, my father rocked the ’stache for a good, long time (unironically). Perhaps the most killer piece in his wardrobe was a stylish “After Six” tuxedo from Valenti’s of Michigan (with such bespoke features as black velvet lapels and blue ruffled shirt). I’ve grown the mustache and worn the tux many times in honor of him–unfortunately, neither tactic resulted in ladies’ phone numbers. But what distinguishing characteristics of time/place do we have in the early 2000s? How will our kids view us 25 years from now? Sad to say, but probably just as iPhoning, computing dads and not so much as “manly outdoorsman” (I speak for myself). So maybe it’s a wake-up call. For us to get out there and do things that our kids might someday consider “cool.”
To get back to the ads: there are a few unsavory things going on. Like your dad grinding on some chick on the dance flo’. That’s pretty porno, and not a fatherly image I want to dwell on for any significant amount of time. That ‘creep factor’ has probably had an impact on the campaign’s efficacy. Because you might start thinking, “My dad was probably just as much of a jerk to the ladies as I was.” He probably told lots of women he’d call them back. Or said: “It’s not you, it’s me.” And that kind of bums me out because I saw him as a pretty nice guy. While these ads are clever and entertaining, I guess I found myself thinking about them far too philosophically. Which is probably why I didn’t exactly run out to buy a bottle of Canadian Club. What was your dad like back in the day? Are there any traits of his that you want to emulate or repudiate? These ads were brought to us by the fine advertisin’ folks at Energy BBDO in Chicago.
“Your Home Can Be 100% Childproof!”Most of us know that’s not possible. But for a fee (sometimes hefty), you can bring a self-proclaimed Child Safety Expert into your home to judge your killer surroundings. The author of this article in the New York Times invited several such folks to her place to point out the carnage her unstable furniture and garrote-like window shade strings had in store for the babies.
Or maybe by the time she left, you’d just be $300 poorer. Even with the help of a “professional,” doesn’t it seem impossible that one could childproof a home? Those rugrats are going to find all sorts of ways to get into trouble and endanger their lives. Of course, parents should do what they can to keep their home as safe as possible, but is the hiring of consultants going too far? Besides, that $300 consulting fee could be spent on diapers–you know, to crap-proof your furniture. Have any of you had a child-safety consultant in your home, or did you rely on common sense to make an attempt at childproofing? Care to share any childproofing tips/tricks? NOTE: A search of “child proof” in Google Images resulted in this picture. It also speaks to most everyone’s wish to have the Teletubbies incarcerated. “Free Baby Stuff” Craigslist AdThe following are some highlights from an amusing Craigslist post of a dad trying to get rid of baby stuff (brought to us by those “Jerks in Your Area“)
We think that’s a pretty entertaining way to get rid of your baby junk. How have you liquidated the baby stuff you no longer needed? Did you cash in on Craigslist or hand-it-down to a friend or family in need? Advice We ApplaudThere are some sites you see that you think, “Man, I wish I’d thought of that.” Because they’re so simple, because they speak so honestly, because they work. Case in point is Walker Lamond’s site (and now book), “1001 Rules for My Unborn Son.”
Some excerpts:
My advice to readers: visit his site and submit some advice of your own (maybe he’ll include it). Cheers, Walker, keep up the good work. The Great Diaper Bag Debateby Rob Curtis
I’ve got a gripe with diaper bags. My wife and I were lucky enough to be given two different fully-stocked diaper bags as gifts from my sister. It’s not that they’re pink or unusable, it’s the fact that they scream DIAPER BAG! While we are set for these bags, I have been looking into an option that we can use for our daughter, Chandler, well beyond the diaper days as a “weekend bag.” So this post could be useful for those of you looking to register for diaper bag you can use now and down the road.
We like both “traditional” diaper bags we have as one is smaller and the other more of a weekender. But I have found that when it’s “dad time” with Chandler, I reach for my go-to bag for the last 15 years: a Mountainsmith Day Pack (pictured at right). This pack is great because it has two bottle holders on the outside, two separate compartments, and a nice zippered interior pocket for essential can’t-lose back-up items (e.g., pacifier). My wife, Leigh, grabs the other bags for an afternoon out, but I like to use the one that’s most compact, easy to swing over the shoulder, and easily accessible for our stuff–but most important, something that fits my rugged, mountain-manliness. I have also used my Patagonia Half Mass bag as as another diaper bag alternative (note price comparisons at bottom of linked page, you can find a lower price on previous year’s coloring which can save $40 in this case). You will also need a diaper changing pad to throw into your bag for those on-the-move changing situations. As for the long-term diaper bag/weekend bag solutions I have been looking to grab the Patagonia Full Mass (on sale, of course). If the Full Mass isn’t to your liking/or cost parameters there are many variations of messenger bags from many brands including DadGear. A great starting point is ebags.com to find what you like and then compare prices. As I see deals on various bags, I will post in the comments section. Why all the fuss, you ask? When you whip out that sweet, polka-dotted, ultra-fem bag your wife registered for, your masculinity takes a little hit. Sure, we can take it, we’ve suffered worse indignities. But this is one area where you might want to take a little extra time finding the bag with form/function that you want to carry. Regarding a “Helpful” Email for Expecting MomsAs my wife is expecting, she signed up to receive these “Your Pregnancy Week-by-Week” email updates. Take a gander:
As with most weeks, I really must call foul on many aspects of this “American Pregnancy” update. Especially under the “Tips for Mom’s Partner” section–below right. (Make sure to take a moment to note how happy and contented dad looks assembling that mobile over the crib!) I’m hoping my wife and I are not alone among expecting couples who haven’t done much (or anything) to prepare. Some folks are all about arranging the nest–even six months out–and that’s a fine approach. But what about those of us who have no interest in creating a “theme”, or thinking about paint colors for the baby’s room? How about “current color chic”? Or maybe, “no theme at all”? I’m all for the baby getting the majority of our attention once it has arrived, and I’m sure that for the lad/lass their million toys/books/pieces of clothing will suffice. Even if we went to great lengths to paint our second tiny bedroom in an attempt to make it a “proper nursery”, would the baby appreciate whether the walls were pink or blue? Another bullet-point under “Tips for mom’s partner” is: “Put the crib/bassinet together.” Isn’t it taking the pre-planning thing a bit too far when you have a crib ready with five months to go? I’d just trip over the thing every time I entered the room, and I’d also NOT have a home office for several more precious months. I don’t think I/we are procrastinating, but more “living our lives” until the time arrives to actually get this stuff done. But I certainly understand why people prepare–they want to create great life for their children, and making a lovely room is a step in that direction. What about you? Did you have the baby’s room fully kitted out months in advance, or is your kid 10 years old and you have yet to get a crib? The Pacifier, Re-BrandedThe most honest way to look at a time-tested solution. After all, it’s a little bit for the baby, but mostly for us.
What Man Would Go See “Babies” (without being prodded by a woman)?Up for Debate: The soon to be released movie, “Babies” is guaranteed to make the mothers coo. But what about the fathers? Would any dad ever go see this move without the company of a female (presumably, his bride)? Before you comment, watch the trailer. It’s actually kind of cute–for about 45 seconds. But I can’t imagine sitting through the whole thing–especially the baby music-class scene in San Francisco. Presumably, this film was made for parents, but after a long day of taking care of a kid(s), who’d hire a sitter and go see a movie focused solely on what they’re trying to escape? After all, if you’re looking for irritating theater experience, there’s a perfectly good Nicholas Sparks movie out now. On the flipside, what typically female-oriented movies have you been dragged to that you actually enjoyed? FOLLOW UP: The dudes over at DadWagon.com gave a shoutout to this post. Nathan, the author, had a great log-line for the movie, and we think it should be used on the “Babies” promotional posters as a critic’s quote: “…A lushly filmed lactation aid for moms…” Required Readingby M. Gallagher I would like to point you in the direction of some required reading for expecting fathers: 1. The Godfather – Mario Puzo What real or imagined titles would you add to this list?
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(c) 2012 Band of Fathers
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The author tells of her first such consultant visit:
The site features quotes from well-known folks, and witty one-liners from the author himself (many times in context with old-school photos). Clearly, Mr. Lamond wants his boy to know the finer points of life.
